I've never really had a vacation-like Christmas. (like when you were in school, it was awesome to not have to go to school, but it's winter so how is staying in the house all day long a vacation?)
Until this year.
My husband and I have been playing video games, eating cheesecake and hot pockets, wearing nothing but pj's, staying up waaaay to late, and sleeping in waaaay to late- for the past 2 days.
He has this entire week off of work.
It's like we are teenagers with parents out of the country. No responsibility. No rules. No bedtime. No alarms.
I feel like we are being really naughty- like we are going to get caught and get in trouble and have to re-take that really hard algebra test. Our car privileges are gone and we will be grounded for a month with no talking on the phone even.
Or maybe having no schedule has made me completely crazy and I shouldn't be telling the world all of these silly things.
Well, I like it. We're having fun. It's been so relaxing. I know I said I'd write a post a day until the end of the year- but I'm holed up in my house with my sexy husband so I may not have time.
You've probably seen Emerson House, the amazing new modern dollhouse.
I kinda really want one. So I can make teeny tiny perfect furniture to fill it up. What I want even more is for my architect friend Mike to design one and help me build it from scratch.
You should have seen my barbie house. We had the house, but none of the accessories- so I made my own. (out of my mom's fabric/craft stash.)
(and mine was second-hand, missing all the windows and doors shown above.)
My cousin made fun of me once, we were about 10. She joked and laughed that one day I would make my own couch. She thought it was such an insult, now it just sounds stupid. But it didn't hurt my feelings, it just made me think- "Yeah! that would be amazing!"
I will leave the real couch making to Ikea- I have miniatures to dream about.
This tree makes my front room smell soooo delicious!
This is Tilda's favorite ornament- I have to keep it at the bottom of the tree so she can snuggle it without batting it off the tree.
I fell in love with this garland last year at Basket Loft- this year it was 70% off, so I bought the lot!
I love the sugary texture of candy ornaments- my brother has one that "santa" gave him when he was teeny- it's a candy train, and the gumdrops are so realistic, it's magical. To this day I am still a little jealous that it's his and not mine.
I got these frosty hearts at Ikea last year.
Sweet little bird...
All wrapped and under the tree...
I love the little red glitter balls, also at Ikea last year.
I asked Danny if we could spend our anniversary at the Old Hen Inn next year. It just so happens that there is a nerd node conference the following week in Portland.
Yea! Six months from now we will be chilling in Snowqualmie, at the BEST b&b around, just outside of Seattle- then a short drive down to Portland where Danny can geek out while I shop at really cool fabric shops!
Baking and decorating large cakes. Give me 200+ cupcakes over a 3 tiered, fondant covered mountain any day.
Ex boyfriends that want to be friends on FB. Actually, it pisses me off more than it stresses me out. I'm married now, morons. I want nothing in the world to do with you. And if I ever see you in public and you try to size up my ex-Marine of a husband, he will most likely punch you in the face.
What worries me the most?
When my siblings and/or closest friends are hurt, sad, or suffering. I turn into a very overprotective gorilla/ninja/bitch. Sorry guys. I can't quite help it. I'm trying harder to stay out of it.
What causes me misery, heartache and pain?
Myself. Luckily, I dropped all the haters I had as friends a long time ago- so now the only enemy I have is myself. I have depression and anxiety (doesn't everybody?) that egg each other on. I get depressed when I am experiencing anxiety, I have anxiety when I've been depressed.
Luckily, with the help of some honest doctors I have found the perfect drug combination to keep it all at bay- ok that's not true. I have to be very aware of my state of mind, get out of the house, rely on my husband to take some of the burden away- just a hug does freakin wonders. Regular time with family, sewing, baking and very recently- babysitting Van, keeps my demons away.
Also, my biological clock is driving me crazy. It's got to be hormonal- these irrational thoughts and jealousies seemingly out of nowhere that make me feel like less of a person. Deep down, away from those stealthy hormones I know that Danny and I will have a family, someday, when our babies are ready to join us. We have no infertility issues, nothing to worry about. SO WHY AM I SO FREAKIN WORRIED ABOUT IT!?!?!? See? Irrational.
Misery- Country Music, Opera, Classical. Zombie movies. Movies about aliens/space.
Pain- Christmas music, especially Charlie Brown. Randy Newman. Caillou.
What makes me happy?
When my husband comes home from work. When he walks in that door- sometimes I jump up and down, sometimes I run at him with a bear hug- sometimes I'm sewing and I don't even hear him come in and he has to make a lot of noise so he doesn't startle me.
The fact that my cats love sleeping on me. I think they love me not having a job and staying home all day more than I do. Matilda loves sleeping on legs, purring very loudly. Kobe loves spooning with me at night- with her head on the pillow and under the covers of course. I usually wake up to her curled around my head- paws stuffed into my hair. 9/10 grey hairs I find on my head are actually cat hairs, embedded from the nesting ritual she performs in the wee morning hours.
Loo-loo. The benefit I gain from chillin with her every week is massive. We have the greatest friendship- not just as sisters, but the sister aspect makes it even more amazing.
Sewing- duh. Well, just creating in general. I love a good challenge. I've been experimenting so much lately, that I might just be venturing into (gasp) clothes. Like adult for me clothes. Nothing solid yet.
Friends. I don't have many. I've been spending a lot of time with Nan and baby Van- it's been so nice. I love that Nan is so openly honest about what being a new mom is like- and that she actually trusts me to watch her tiny child for hours at a time. He constantly smiles- looking away is impossible. I can't wait to have my own...and then our kids can be like BFF's just like us and it will be so amazing and cool and. Ehem. Getting a little ahead of myself.
Damn fine coffee.
...and a ton more. I didn't intend this post to be so damn long, and rant-y. (ish?)
2: I wish I had enough guts to wear red lipstick everyday. (Who am I kidding? Just once a month would be an improvement.)
3: My dream job is to make custom dollhouses, complete with furniture and all the little details.
4: I love being an auntie. Will my babies smell as delicious as baby Van does?
5: I am the only Utahn that despises fry sauce.
6: I want to move somewhere that has no snow. For a little while, at least. Utah will always be my home.
7: Anne Rice's vampires are my favorite. Joss Whedon's are in second place. The X-files version is last place- don't watch that episode. You'll only torture yourself. Trust me.
8: If I had the space (like a ranch), and an assistant (to clean the litter boxes), and the money (to spay and neuter them all) I would totally rescue every cat I could get my hands on.
9: I hope that having children will inspire me to have "Christmas spirit". Otherwise, I will have to send them over to Mike & Nan's for movies about Santa's workshop, Christmas music & figgy pudding. (you can make figgy pudding, right?)
10: I have been craving a Monte Cristo sandwich ever since I had one at the Westside Diner in Boise. Anyone know where I can get one in Utah?
11: I kill houseplants (including our real Christmas tree) because I forget to water them.
12: The acne I had as a teenager was nothing compared to the adult acne I have now.
13: I love the smell of tomato plants, yet I loathe tomatoes.
14: Last week, I got my very first crown. I like it. Could I just get all my teeth replaced with implants & crowns?
15: These days, I hardly ever wake up before 11 a.m.
When most people (bloggers) disappear for a bit after blogging regularly, they turn out to be pregnant. I hear those first few months are hell.
I have disappeared, but I assure you, I am not, I repeat, I am 100% sure that we are not expecting.
I've just been busy. And I may or may not have gotten out of the blogging habit- the empty flash card in my camera proves it.
I have been working on a very special quilt just for our future children. I made some blankets and a quilt for a friend that is having a girl in February- I will post photos when I get the quilt back from the quilters. I have been making a million freakin hair clips, because everyone wants them. I have been selling a ton- and I don't even sell them in stores! It's nuts. I have all these fun projects lined up, ready to go- and I have no desire to sew anything right now.
Last week I got to babysit little Van for the first time- so his momma could go and work out. He is such a little sweetheart- he even snuggled with me for a half hour or so, completely calm and content. It freakin killed me! Oh he is just so perfect! I am trying to figure out how to get him to laugh for me- currently he only does it for his parents. He is 4 months now- can you believe it?
I'll get my mojo back, but it might be after the holidays- so don't abandon me quite yet.